August 13th I somehow rounded up a semi-large group of people to go to the BikeKitchen for the once monthly free concert. It's a fundraiser of sorts of the Bike Kitchen, which I guess is a cooperative and community learning business that allows people to work together and learn how to repair their own bikes. Something like that. On the second Saturday of each month when the weather is nice, they have three bands play for free and they have $3 beers and free snacks. I had been going with Raj all spring and after that friendship exploded into tiny little pieces (literally an explosive phone call in which he criticized me in detail because our friends had assumed more about our friendship than there was- an assumption I had also been confused about). I was quite pleased to have rounded up this big group! All of our friends from Sloppy Moose (running club) and my friend Brian had all come so there were close to ten people I was personally acquainted with present. It felt like I really had friends, which felt great.
This one girl from runningclub had brought a random guy- a vertically challenged, tan fellow in a plain white t-shirt with a quick whit who made a few snappy sexually twinged jokes I couldn't help but snort at. We had the same sense of humor and as the night went on, and we drankmore beers we sort of drifted off into our own conversation. My friend Brian left and while I followed him around on the street for a bit, I ultimately came back and spent more time talking with this guy, whose name was apparently Geoff.
Geoff had work early the next day and didn't get out much so he left on his bike to go back home. After he did, the girls in the group immediately began quizzing me about Brian, which confused me. "We're just friends." I relayed the story of our ill-fated attempt at dating from over two years ago and they stared at me blankly while Eric texted wildly in the corner. Geoff apparently was not un-interested, but refused to ask for my number.
Now drunk, I texted him from Eric's phone and told him not to be a pussy. While I did that, Katrina pickpocketed my phone, texted Geoff from my phone impersonating me.
Geoff and I soberly put together the orchestrated set up over the next few days and committed to revenge. We plotted pranks and I liked him even more when he ran through some of the lame attempts at pranks he had made in the past. (No one can compete with me.) In the course of all that texting, we finally got around to liking each other and planning a date, although it took quite a while. Geoff not only moved slow, had no sense of urgency, but also claimed to be a feminist. in my purview, this really came off more as laziness than anything else. There was no equality in the situation. He expected all moves to be made by the woman, which, just resulted in no movement at all. We eventually got a date planned to go to Federalist, but only after I very directly had to ask whether he was interested in me at all because based on his behavior, it didn't seem like it.
Federalist had a line out the door so we wandered over to Kupros and ended up having a great conversation and despite his dorky white socks, and his awkward stare at the end of the date, I liked him. He was going out of town for over a week and we talked pretty incessantly while he was gone.
He was testing to become a Wildlife or backwoods or something EMT and failed miserably. Everyone in the course worked professionally in the field and he had an Environmental Science degree and worked in hazardous waste. He called himself a sell out on the environment, and had other dreams, it was just a matter of getting there. I appreciated that he gave it a try and was willing to work hard towards his goals. When he got back, we went to Ruhstaller for another date and it was weird.
He immediately struck up a conversation with an older couple and I felt like I was being dumped on the date. He physically turned his back to me and ignored me. For over an hour he was engaged in a deep conversation with the guy and I attempted to connect with the drunk woman. For all that we had talked, I felt so confused. I liked the guy, I thought he was cute, but he wasn't even trying to get to know me in person. I was smart, funny, well educated, and he literally was rejecting me before our date had started. It was bizarre. I tried to ignore it and assumed either he or I would just leave at some point or this would be the end of the date. At some point I mentioned to the woman this was only our second date and she looked horrified. She assumed we had been together a long time. She signaled to her husband and almost immediately left and shut both conversations down. I was relieved and grateful she did this. It was like a flip of a switch. Geoff and I got up and moved from the bar to a table, sat next to each other and talked. It was great. It was easy and sharp. He was very harsh, but it worked and I liked that he was smart. We were at Ruhstaller a long time before we stopped and got a pizza dinner somewhere. He tried to talk me into going to the penny arcade but I felt drunk and didn't want to stand.
He walked me up to my car while he wheeled his bike with his dorky helmut on top of his head. He looked so idiotic it was cute and I couldn't help but laugh. I wanted to kiss him. We got to my car and I waited. Nothing. I still felt buzzed and felt so frustrated I finally just reached across and grabbed him.
We made out under a streetlight at D and 10th for over 25 minutes. That's the only time I've ever kissed a man first.
Geoff turned out to be a real asshole and in retrospect, it was there all along. He was flakey and unreliable. He was controlling and manipulative. He pressured me and overall wasn't very interested but was looking for a space filler. He used me and ultimately dumped me via text message after we had dated for almost 3 months. I literally never saw him again. There was no goodbye, no returning of items, no closure, nothing. He left on a trip, and that was it. He's a horrible person and if I see him again I'd punch him in the wiener. The only good thing he ever gave me was the experience of using a kayak. Otherwise I wish I could have erased this entire experience from my life. I essentially lost all of my friends from running club over his idiocy.
Weeks after the text message break up, he was periodocilly still texting me, saying he would be bringing by a wooden shelf he had built for my bathtub. I had explicilty told him- do not promise me you're going to build me this thing if you're not really going to do it. It's just upsetting. He promised he would do it. Then he'd send updates. I didn't insist on closure because allegedly this was coming. Then on snapchat he's holding hands with some girl. Apparently our break up was actually due to some girl either he previously dated, or liked or was friends with becoming single again. I confronted him over text about how he never closed out our relationship before moving on to the next one. You do not date someone for three months and break up with them over text message. That is wrong. You don't lead them to believe you have feelings and you're making plans for the holidays and birthdays and so on and dump them over a text two days later without warning. He's a horrible person. Again. I hope I never see him again but if I do, I'd punch him in the wiener.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment