The Hot Buttered Rum Run 12k (#14 of 14) Grief and Mourning

It was our very last race of 2014!!! November 30th, 2014 in Vancouver, Washington! The grand finale to all of my and Sarah's hard work all over the state of Oregon- we wrapped up our big adventures just over the border! I honestly didn't do much to train for this race other than walking the dog regularly, but I did finish the race!

 

The big stop in the middle was waiting outside the bathrooms for a lady I ended up bonding with. I promised to wait for her, and I did! It was very cold and by the end I was pretty much walking all of it (or it felt like it). I was just so cold and tired! And it was so windy!

 

 

This race was the Saturday after Thanksgiving. On the Thursday before, my friend Natalie who I had known since kindergarten, and who had lived around the corner from me all of my childhood- her mother died from brain cancer. I felt numb. I had messaged my parents on Wednesday night letting them known Sandy was going home on hospice if they wanted to go see her- the family was asking for visitors. But Natalie posted on Facebook Thursday morning that Sandy was already gone.

 

My best friend Kristin's dad Jerry had already died in August, and that had been so overwhelming I had just gone into "helper" mode. Another good friend whose mom died too young had helped me make goody bags to entertain all of the kids at the funeral so the grown ups could just focus on taking care of themselves, and I had just tried to pitch in and help wherever I could. Jerry always treated me like a spare kid- even added me and labeled me on Facebook as one of his children (a loving act I didn't feel I could acknowledge without upsetting my parents, but one that endeared me to him forever.) Sandy dying unleashed those feelings much more so. That was Thursday.

 

On Monday (before Thanksgiving) I had been at school talking with the program assistant in the office and said goodbye and walked out of the building to go home. My phone beeped with a text message from my friend Kristin, Jerry's daughter. It said, " Did you see Kelly Dorn died."

 

My brain talked to me like it was a separate entity from my body. I heard it say, "Do you want to go to your car and be in private when you react to this? Or do you want to go back into the office and be with people? You have about 20 seconds to get where you want to be, and then it will be too late."

 

I met Kelly Dorn in 7th grade. She was a really good friend. She was a fellow wedding photographer . She asked me to shoot her wedding actually (I was booked though; something I will always regret), and came to me for advice regularly. Kelly came to my birthday parties, was a confidante, and signed my year book every year. We sang in choir together, took craft classes and had dozens of mutual friends. Her best friend Barbara was another mutual friend. Kelly used to read this blog. Kelly knew all of my secrets.  

 

When Kelly delivered her daughter 4 years before her death she was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition (PPCM) Peri/Post Partum Cardiomyopathy. Her heart functioned like an old person's. With careful care and monitoring she could live awhile, but Kelly didn't have great coping mechanisms with the stressors in her life and probably shortened her life because of it. Her husband came home from a late shift at the hospital and she was gone. She had been home alone with their daughter at the time. It was the first night their daughter ever slept through the night without climbing in bed with mom and dad. Ever. Tender mercies.

 

The day I found out I stared at my phone for a second, and then turned around and ran back into the law school. I wanted to be with people. I didn't want to do this alone.

 

I burst back into the program assistant's office and said "My friend died. Close the door."

 

Another student was in the office- a student whose parents had passed away a few years ago and she reached over and closed the door. They both looked back at me wide eyed- horrified at my words.

 

Then I lost control.

I hyperventilated.

I sobbed.

I shook.

 They tried to put me in a chair or on the floor and tried to get me to slow down my breathing until I just started crying that everybody dies, and why does everybody have to die? 

 

I don't remember much about being there. I don't really remember anything else about the rest of the day. Sarah picked me up at home that night.

 

Saturday I ran Hot Buttered Run, and I ran it with this shirt I made.

The front said, "You are so dear to me." And the back said, "Jerry, Sandy, Kelly."

 

About halfway through the race a woman struck up a conversation with me about my shirt and I told her about all three of my friends who died, and we talked about them for the whole second half of the race. I cried off and on, but I finished.

 

And that's all that really was important about that day.

 

 

Pie in the Sky, Harvest Festival 5k (#13 of 14)

Race #13 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 39:53

 We did this last 5k race up in Salem, near my mom's house in Silverton! It was a nice flat course and I felt great! The ony sucky part was doing that last 100 yards or so over grass- it was bumpy and uneven and I couldn't sprint to the finish because I was afraid of falling and twisting an ankle! It was dumb! We had told my mom where we were racing but she didn't realize until afterwards how close we were so she zipped over to say hi and we checked out the pie store. It was good to see her and fun!

 We also got a free handheld pie as part of our race package! Our favorite races are ones that have food!!!

 My "pie in the sky!"

Cosmos 7k Race Report (#12 of 14)

Race #12 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 1:00:12

This race was all drama, and the course was definitely short, but I loved it. I flew back very early in the morning from a wedding in California, and because my flight was delayed, I had to drive straight from the airport 2.5-3 hours (no memory of how long it was anymore!) to Bend, Oregon. I was supposed to be able to go home to Eugene first, and then Sarah was supposed to drive, but my flight was so delayed I might not have made it. We decided to drive separately, and Sarah's boyfriend Mitch ended up driving her the two hours to Bend, dropping her off and going back home.

This was a night race, and all women. It was very cool. It was also extremely hilly, which drove me crazy. There's no way to PR if there's going to be that many elevation changes because I struggle to keep going just on the flat! The elevation changes were around 260 feet. That's alot! All of my splits were over 14 minutes. And according to my Garmin, the course was only 4 miles, instead of 4.25.

That said, this race came with FOUR mixed drinks, a commemorative glass, and a purple tech t-shirt, which is my favorite of all our race shirts. The party afterwards was very fun!

This race also had the best swag EVER. This is everything I brought home in my goodie bag or got at the after party. I would for sure do this again!

Like I said, this trip was full of drama though. In addition to the plane problem, and the separate cars and Sarah and Mitch running late, I ended up getting sick on the way home. We had a nice sit down dinner at a Mexican restaurant in Three Sisters and just about as soon as it was over I started panicking that I was going to throw up or "have to use the bathroom." We rushed to a gas station and I ended up both vomiting and having a quakey tummy. I was really car sick the whole way home too. It was gross. It was about this time I started having a sensitivity to tomatoes and raw tomatoes started making me throw up, almost instantly. It seems to have calmed down a bit now, but the last few months I have throw up each time I forgot and ate them- within like 5 minutes. I suspect it's some kind of an acid problem and I'm also having a ton of gas and belly aches from eating uncooked vegetables. I don't really understand where it's coming from but it seems to be getting better.

Mount Angel Oktoberfest 5k Race Report (#11 of 14)

Race #11 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 41:55

 So I'm quite a bit behind on blogging my races from this year, so I'm trying to catch up! It's hard to remember how this went when I blog so far after the fact so I need to not do that in the future!

In September, Sarah and I did the Oktoberfest 5k in Mount Angel. Mount Angel has a HUGE festival and over 300,000 people come into this germanic village that has a population of like 100 or something. It's sort of wild. I remember this being a good race, with a flat course and good weather. Afterwards we got our free beers that came with our race bibs! I just remember it was really warm, and being tired and the beer being really, really refreshing, which is not typically how I feel about beer! It was very cold though and it felt good! Then we ran around sampling food and checking out the festival. We  sampled lots of different things. It was a good adventure!

Sarah also forgot her IS (of course, because she always does!) and I had to sneak her into one of the food tents. She went through the line like a minor, while I got ID'd and hand stamped. I realized I could re-stamp her hand with my wet stamp so I can over to her and pressed the backs of our hands together and transferred my stamp to her hand so we could both get in and have lunch together. I was pretty proud of my sneakiness there!

We decided to bring home Charlie Brown the leftover sausage we got... so Sarah tied it up with her heart rate monitor! LOL

Junction City Scandinavian Festival 5k Race Report (#10/14)

Race #10 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 39:18

 

Race number 10! We got here so fast! My friend Sarah and I made a goal earlier this year to run 14 races in 2014! It's been really fun, and we've traveled all over the state of Oregon running! We've each done a couple on our own, and the rest together.

 

I want to write more about this later, but I want to at least touch on this so everything is chronological. My best friend Kristin's dad was diagnosed with cancer about 6 weeks ago and was sadly told it has progressed too far before they caught it. It was his second battle with cancer, and he went downhill very rapidly. The night before the race I talked with some of Kristin's family, and Kristin and they didn't think he'd made it through the night. Sarah and I ended up staying up until 1am the night before the race working on some things for the family. I left her house after that, slept until 4am when my phone beeped with a text message that Jerry had passed away. I'll go into more detail on Jerry's story in another post. Honestly it's too overwhelming to write about yet.

 

I got up about an hour and a half later and picked up Sarah at 6:50am to drive to Junction City. We got lost on the way there, but we made it by 7:30am, got free street parking (yay!) and got our race packets. No swag this time, but I decided when I got up that morning that I wanted to "Jog for Jerry." I made a silly little sign, and asked Sarah if she thought it was dumb, but she didn't, so we pinned it on my back. 

 

 

Because I know someone is sure to ask, NO that is not my bra hanging out in the back. That is the design of the back of my support tank, which is two-tone. I usually wear a shirt over my tank, but the last couple of races I've gotten a little chaffing from running in the heat in my shirts, or my shirt has ridden up and obscured my bib. The tank is really, really supportive, and almost compression style, which I really love. It's really difficult for me to find tops that fit that I can comfortable work out in. This tank was from Old Navy, but unfortunately, they don't make it anymore. I plan to wear it until it shreds.

 

The race started at 8:15am sharp and we were ready to go! I ran my fastest mile (by ONE second) the first mile, and jogged the first almost 5 minutes solid. I have finally established a fairly predictable pattern the last few races. I typically run the first .5 mile, which takes me about 5 minutes. Then I start intervaling. Because of this, my first mile is always my fastest. If I start slow, it doesn't seem to change how long I run (yet), so I'm going to stick with this method as long as it works! Mile two is my slowest mile, and then once I hit mile 3, I speed up again, usually sprinting into the finish.

 

This course was really great. It had some mild elevation changes, which gave it variety, nothing remotely challenging, but just enough to encourage you to run the downs, and the "hills" mild enough to trick you into thinking you could run the whole thing. I don't know that I am walking less on these races, but I am running faster. Whatever works I guess!

 

 

I was pretty deep in my thoughts during the race- so much so, I never saw Sarah pass me on the out and back even though she tried to get my attention. For a few minutes I almost thought she had dropped out or something because I never saw her. It's more likely though she passed me when I was thinking about Jerry, and trying not to cry. (I was only moderately successful at that challenge.)

 

Because I had finally met my 5k goal (a sub-40), I wasn't too stressed about over reaching for any improvements on this one. I wasn't worried about PR'ing. I understood my running routine and just kind of generally hoped to stay under 45 minutes because that's been pretty consistent for me these days.

 

My last race at the Eugene Marathon 5k in July was a 39:53, but today I whupped that and got a 39:18! Amazing! Thank you for running with me Jerry- I felt you with me the whole way!

After the race, I was pleased to see the water and snack stations were easy to find and very accessible right at the end of the chute. (Unlike the Eugene Marathon.) I was less pleased to see after I stopped my Garmin that it had only register 3.08 miles instead of 3.11. I almost wanted to scream. I would have restarted the watch and finished the last .03/.02 but I didn't recognize the deficient until the moment the screen was clearing as I saved the data. D'oh.

We walked back to the car, hung out a bit, freshened up, and then walked around the fair!

We scoped everything out first, but then I headed straight to the Swedish pancake booth to get some pancakes and lingonberry jam! It was great!

Close up. I grew up on these. My mom's side is 100% Swedish, and we often had Swedish pancakes for Christmas breakfast. If you haven't had them before, they are like a very thin crepe.

Sarah opted to have something called a Aebleskiver, which is a Danish donut hole type thing that you dunk in jam. it was very good too! Here are the ladies making it. It was very fun to watch!

After that we checked out all the booths, walked around, took our picture in front of the giant Dala Horse, and finally settled on lunch. We both got Swedish meatballs with white gravy, which was amazing. I also got criss cut (waffle) sweet potato fries with a lingonberry ketchup. All was excellent!

All in all, it was a pretty great day! I'm so grateful that I have been able to make a friend who has similar interests as me, likes to spend time together and do fun things that are good for our bodies- like eating treats!

Eugene Marathon 5k Race Report (#9 of 14)

Race #9 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 39:55

The morning of the race, we met at Grocery Outlet and then drove over to campus together in my car since I have a parking permit. We stopped at Dutch Brothers so Sarah could get coffee, and awesomely enough, finally spotted the elusive Jurassic Park jeep we had heard was around town! My friend Chloe spotted it first in a random driveway and took pics with it in the middle of the night. Being a huge JP fan I desperately wanted to find it, so I was thrilled find out our Dutch Brothers barista owned it! I asked if we could take pictures, and he was so excited someone had asked rather than just climb all over his car (what the?) that he said sure!

That was way fun!


This race was both awful and wonderful. I FINALLY met my PR goal of going sub-40. Seven months of working on it, and I finally did it! I think it really helped that the course had some good easy downhills, that it was a "home" town race, and that I have been doing the Couch to 5k a little again. (Only up through week 2 though, because you have to pay for it after that point!)

My biggest complaint about this race is that it was over 85 degrees at 8am, and there was NO WATER on the course. I was SO thirsty, and felt SO awful, and kept looking for water and there was none. I could not believe that an event as huge as the Eugene Marathon wouldn't have water on the course. There honestly, in my memory, was not a single other race we did this year that didn't have a water station of some kind.

I was feeling pretty horrific by the end of the race, getting dizzy, couldn't speak- I had not hydrated beforehand as I should have, and the lack of water totally through me off. I also had had a pretty salty breakfast which did not help matters. (AND a whole Salted Caramel Gu too)

I was ready to bite someone's head off by the end of the race but I just wanted water.

So You can imagine my raging anger when I sprinted into the finish (running an 8:31 minute mile the last .11) on the famous Hayward Field track at University of Oregon, only to find, AGAIN, no water at the finish. I started randomly babbling to people- "Water?! WATER?!" But they either could not understand me, or ignored me. (I know I looked awful.) We had to walk a good additional .2 standing in lines like cattle to get our swag bags- again, NO WATER. I was starting to cry at this point. Another .1 and we're in the finisher's corral. WHERE"S THE WATER?!

The super dumb runner's corral.


When Sarah found me, I was so pissed off and so sick I was shaking and basically staggering. We finally found the water and I literally had to lay down because I felt so awful. I was super proud of my time, but so angry something as basic as a water station had been over looked. Just because a race course is short does not mean water should be overlooked- particularly in July when it was 85 degrees! I got so sick, so fast, and not everyone on that course was fit- I'm certainly not and there were plenty more like me, or struggling more! Frankly, I think the lack of water was dangerous and reckless.

Oh, and the water they had? Tasted strongly of plastic. The pancakes we were supposed to get afterwards had also apparently been made with the same contaminated-tasting water because the flavor of plastic was STRONG in the pancakes. We threw them away after two bites.

Loud complaining aside, I finally met my goal! This was so exciting. And I am so proud, even if the race itself sucked.


After the race, I ran home, and cleaned like crazy because my friend Nicole and her family were coming to town from Utah for family pictures! So exciting!
 

Bend, Oregon Spark Your Heart 5k Race Report (#8 of 14)

Race #8 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 44:23

Sarah and I decided to do this race the NIGHT BEFORE, at like, 11pm. I had wanted to do a 4th of July race, and spontaneously decided on this one the night before, texted Sarah, and we again, got up at like 4am and drove the 2 hours to Bend. Sarah had just gotten back from camping out there, so it was nice to have an "insider!"

We registered that morning, and it was good. I also wore one of my new race shirts that I had had custom made on etsy. Super fun!

I felt like I started out strong for the first half mile or so. I think this was the first race where I ran the first five minutes pretty straight, no stopping. However, I started feeling crappy again in mile two and couldn't get going again.

I also had this weird interaction with this weirdo couple who, when I got close to them to pass, suddenly split, with the wife running on the right of the trail, and the husband on the left. As you know, you always pass on the left. (Walkers left, runners right. Just like on the highway). I had just been calling out "Passing on the left!" When the guy darted to the left. I didn't understand what was happening- Did they want me to run inbetween them? And WHY? It felt awkward. So I just said, "I don't understand what's happening!" And then guy started running ont he grass! WHY? If you are running as a pair, one person could fall behind the other into single file so the passing person can get by. But that's only if the trail is narrow and this was basically a sidewalk. If they had just hugged the right for a second we could have avoided all that confusion. It was super annoying.

Crossing the finish in front of the annoying people. Yes, I ruined it for them. However, they kept trying to talk to me and joke and split the path the rest of the race so I just stopped caring.


The trail was pretty but I didn't feel great and this wasn't a PR for me. My cuboid bone was bothering me a bit, and I just felt tired. It happens! Trail was pretty though, and full of variety- sidewalk, wood bridges, roads, dirt trail by the river! I'd like to go back to Bend again.

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After the race we went for a drive, screwed around in a meadow doing dance moves, and spent a good 20 minutes searching for Sarah's car keys, which we lost during the dancing in the field shenanigans.

We also had Hawaiian for lunch for the first time, which was very good! I don't really see the different between Hawaiian and a lot of Asian food- it just seemed like it had pineapple added. (I'm assuming it was wildly inauthentic, but it was good.)

Lebanon Strawberry Festival Run Race Report (#7 of 14)

Race #7 of our 14 in 2014 Race Series. Time: 41:07

 

The Strawberry Festival probably could have been pretty interesting if either of us had been locals, but we both felt kind of "other'ed" in town, and didn't really feel a part of anything. We saw part of the parade, but we missed the giant strawberry shortcake that was supposed to feed 10,000 people. We just never saw anything. No booths, or anything. We had trouble finding the start too.

 It was another early race, a good hour away. It was a long, straight out and back course. I got a RAGING belly ache in mile 2 and thought I was going to literally have an accident. (aka, poop my pants). I felt awful, and wanted to quit a lot. I made it though. The weather had just started to turn warm and I think this is one of the last races I wore in capris/pants before I switched to an old pair of bike shorts I had found that work much better for me.

The one exciting thing we DID do was go to Dutch Brothers afterwards. I had never been and Sarah swore there was a Frappuccino like item that only had 65 calories. It was tasty! (Sugar Free non fat double torture!)