Going to Court, Part 2

Okay, so we left off with me frantically flipping through papers and then not providing everything I had. Hmmmm.

I handed what I thought were all the papers I needed to the bailiff, and he walked them back to Matt and his wife. Who were sitting on the Platintiff's side of the room for some reason. ...He's a cop, he goes to court all the time, and each podium was clearly labeled on each side. ("Plaintiff" on the right, and "Defendant" on the wrong left side.)What is he, slow? Thanks for supporting me and sitting on the Plaintiff's side buddy!

Anyway, he gave him the papers, and they handed the wife's email to me. I only skimmed it to make sure my words hadn't been changed, so it looked okay with this preliminary glance, although it wasn't.

One or two cases went ahead of us, and they were basically time-fillers. both cases were people who only had one party present and needed to reschedule or something. I don't remember.

As soon as we were done playing with the 589,082,749 pages of paperwork we were called up.

I think I said, "Are you freaking KIDDING me?!" I did not want to be first.

Myself, my friend C who served him, my mom, my dad all stood up and were sworn in. On Matt's side, he and his wife were then sworn in.

Then the judge (or referee, he's actually not a judge, but it doesn't really matter) told all of our witnesses to leave. ALL of them. So my parents, C, and his wife didn't hear any of my or Matt's testimony. The only ones who did was my dad's wife, who declined to be sworn in (and wore a face mask, which prompted my friend to ask if she had cancer or something- "What is up with that?!" She had an organ transplant almost 2 years ago and is immune-suppressed so catching a cold could be a huge problem  for her, so she's careful. But I agree she looked like a freak. No judging though, no judging. LOL) My attorney got lost and didn't have her cell, and she made it in about half way through my testimony. She also apparently hopped out in the hall and gave my parents an update, which they all appreciated, and I did too. That was very nice of her and I didn't expect it. I didn't even know she was there though, just my dad's wife, and I was relieved to have not been in there alone.

Anyway, I stood up, walked to the podium with my huge binder, took a huge shaky breath and said, "Good Morning."

Then I started to read this speech. About three sentences in, the Judge interrupted and said he knew I was nervous but he needed me to slow down because he needed to take notes. I took a slower deep breath, repeated my sentence and read the following:

(I would just like to apologize to all of you in advance for not being able to watch this on Judge Judy. I know how you all desperately wished for my moment of reality TV glory. lol)

Good Morning your Honor.

My name is Emily H------ and I was in a relationship with the Defendant from February, 2009 to August 2010.

If you reference the Points & Authorities I filed with my Amended Complaint on October 11th, you can see  my causes of action are Fraud, Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress, Assault, False Imprisonment, Assault, Battery, and Negligent Infliction of Emotional Distress. I have discussed each tort in detail in this document with discussions of my claims.

The Defendant is a California Highway Patrolman, and during our relationship  claimed to work out of the San Francisco and then the Fairfield office of the CHP. During our relationship, he created a false identity for himself, and went by the name Matthew T--------. As a result, I suffered financial damages, which I am suing him for  to restore me to the position I was prior to meeting him.

-Here is our initial point of contact when the Defendant emailed me through an online dating website and identified himself as "Mat in Woodland."
-- If you refer to Attachment ONE in your packet, the first page is an instant messenger conversation  where the Defendant identifies himself as a CHP in San Francisco and that at the time of the conversation, he had been single for 4.5 years. Also attached in Attachment ONE is another instant messenger conversation where he provides his phone number, which is the same number listed in the complaint.
--Here is an email he sent me with the name "Matthew T--------," listed as the sender.
--Here is an instant messenger conversation where he states his name is Matthew T--------.

--If you refer to Page 4 of Attachment FOUR  in your packet, which is the statement written on my behalf by the CHP investigator, the investigating Sergant, W---- C-----, conclusively states that the Defendant, Matthew L-------- and the person I dated, Matthew T-------- are the same person. In Sergant C------'s summary of my statement, he recounts my memory of the Defendant signing credit card receipts under the unauthorized alias, and of meeting the Defendant on-duty, where I clearly recall the Defendant wearing a name tag with the name "T--------" on it. For the record, the Defendant worked at the Fairfield office of the CHP with another officer who was apparently named Matthew T-------- and was likely the source of the Defendant's unauthorized nameplate use. 

I agreed to date the Defendant under the false belief that he was who he claimed to be: A single, never married man named T-------- who very much wanted to get married and have children. In reality he was Matthew L--------, married and with one child already. I looked into the Defendant's background but was unable to find any information which contradicted what he told me. As he was a CHP officer, and I had met with him on-duty, and he presented himself as an honorable, forthright person, I had no reason to suspect otherwise.

 

--Here is a news article I found on a man who was a Officer with the Fairfield Office of the California Highway Patrol. When I asked the Defendant if the man in the article was him, he said yes.

 

On August 3rd, 2010, approximately 17 months into our relationship, I became suspicious that the Defendant had not been honest about something, but I wasn't quite sure what.  He had claimed his father was a superior court judge, but the name he provided for his father was not someone who was listed on the California Bar's website.  I wrote a letter to someone who I believed was a family member of the Defendant's and asked that person if the Defendant had been honest with me. That person, who requested they remain anonymous, informed me that the Defendant's name was not Matthew T--------, but it was actually Matthew L--------, that he had lied about his parent's names, his place of residence, where he attended college, that he had lied and said he was fired from the CHP, but he actually hadn't been, that his house had been foreclosed on and he had moved several hours away, and  that he was married, and had an eighteen month old child, who had been born 10 days before we began dating. I did not know or suspect any of these revelations and the impact was devastating.

--Here is the email exchange between myself and the Defendant's family member. I have redacted the family member's name at their request, but I can provide a clean copy instead if that is necessary.

On the same day I wrote the letter to the family member, I found the address of his actual residence that he shares with his wife and child. The Defendant's wife invited me into her home, and thanked me for being honest with her. She asked me a series of humiliating questions, which I answered as best I could. I was crying, shaking, and near hysterical at points. I was able to tolerate this until the Defendant arrived home, and the two began to rage and scream at each other.  I felt both terrified and threatened as to what would happen and feared I could be hurt. I crouched against a wall, but felt too afraid to just run out.  I knew the Defendant carried a firearm on his person at all times, and given his angry state, I did not know what he was capable of.  I asked the Defendant's wife permission to leave the home, and she consented, however, before I could leave, the Defendant and his wife's confrontation cumulated in the Defendant punching holes in the walls, and smashing a glass framed picture to bits. I ducked to avoid being hit. This is the grounds of my first assault claim.

 

 I then rushed out of the house, asking the Defendant's wife if she was safe or if I could call the police. She declined and began screaming at the Defendant again.

Due to my reliance upon the Defendant's consistent and continual deliberate misrepresentations regarding his identity, I treated him as my partner. We planned to be married, and I had gotten quotes from various wedding vendors prior to my unexpected discovery of his actual identity. Due to my reliance on the Defendant's deceit, I spent an incredible amount of money on the Defendant, with the purchase of gifts, food, gas, scrapbooks, printed photos, christmas gifts, cards, letters, gift cards, and baked goods. I also incurred costs to myself as a result of the fraudulent relationship. At one point the Defendant claimed to have accepted a job as a Special Agent with the federal agency Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, and as a show of my support as his wife to be, I purchased a "I love my Special Agent" tshirt, and an ATF sweatshirt. I also purchased a ring to represent our relationship, my support of his new career, and our impending marriage. Additional costs include two cell phone bills which the Defendant was responsible for and  already offered to pay, but which I declined as I believed our relationship was real,  and with additional incidentals arising from highly expensive gas costs and wear and tear on my vehicle as I traveled at some points, daily, to the Fairfield area to meet with the Defendant.

-If you refer to Attachment TWO in your packet, you can see the summarized total of costs incurred during the relationship.
-If you would like an itemized list, I have one available here as well.  

 

As I have discussed the Defendant is liable for actual fraud against me for these intentional misrepresentations of his identity so that he could incur these monetary and physical benefits.  He also committed the torts of IIED and NIED.

The Defendant was fully aware of his true identity throughout our relationship and that he was living a double life. The Defendant made it a point during our relationship to invent a colorful array of personal tragedies to make our relationship more dramatic and emotionally distressing.  He claimed to have been fired from his job, he claimed his house had been foreclosed on, that his dog died, and his father had a stroke and his mother a nervous breakdown. He did these things so I would become upset, and then feel sympathy for him. The Defendant actually did this so much that I had to seek counseling during our relationship to cope with the things he was telling me.  He purposely and with intent engaged in this outrageous and offensive behavior throughout our relationship in order to cause me emotional distress.  

Arising out of the Fraud and my discovery of his double life a lengthy 17 months into our relationship, I suffered an incredible amount of mental distress. I became agoraphobic, afraid to leave my home, and was admitted into a daily outpatient psychiatric care facility to deal with the shock. I was unable to eat, bathe or get out of bed unless absolutely required. I became terrified of men, sirens, uniforms and police. I suffered hyperventilating panic attacks in grocery stores, at work,  in restaurants, and airports. After being pulled over by another CHP officer, I became so terrified and inconsolable, the officer insisted on calling an ambulance, which I had to refuse because I knew I would be more disturbed by the presence of more men in uniforms. Thinking I had seen the Defendant on the street the week of my discovery, I got into a car accident, and then spent an hour on the side of the rode hysterically crying while the driver of the other car tried to assure me that what the Defendant did was not my fault and that I would get better.  The next day, due to a fear for my safety because I was so afraid of the Defendant, I stayed with a friend, and was so upset and distracted, broke my foot.  Over the last 28 months, I have attended at least twice weekly therapy, and have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Major Depression and Anxiety and Panic Disorder as a direct result of the defendant's actions.  As a member of law enforcement, the Defendant took a vow to protect the public and uphold ethical standards in his professional and personal life.  He violated these standards when he without cause and for his own personal entertainment, procured an unauthorized law enforcement stop on me when at the time I was unaware that it was my boyfriend pulling me over. When I included these incidents in my citizen's complaint to the CHP, they conclusively found that the Defendant had misused his position and misidentified himself.  As he is a peace officer, he owes a duty to the public, and as I am a member of the public he owed that duty to me.  When he committed these actions, he not only intentionally caused me emotional distress, but his careless and reckless disregard for my well being  negligently inflicted distress as well.   Therefore, I believe he is additionally liable for NIED.

 

--You can review the conclusions made by the CHP in Attachment  SIX of your packet.

--You can refer to Attachment THREE, which includes letters from two separate therapists who have treated me. I redacted my personal information from the letters, but I have a clean copy if you require one.

--My medical expenses to date have been summarized in Attachment TWO through the date of filing, October 9th. 

--I have a detailed graph which itemizes each visit to the doctor or therapist.  I also have a second version which details my expenses through this week.

Also during our relationship, while the Defendant was a guest in my home, he attacked me and forcibly applied a set of professional handcuffs to my wrist. This is the grounds for my cause of action related to Battery, Assault and False Imprisonment. This was done without my consent, and scared me horribly when it happened. I demanded he remove them, and he refused. The handcuffs were locked with a key, and my wrist was too big for me to be able to simply pull them off. I tried a variety of negotiating tactics to get the Defendant to remove the handcuff, but he refused. We argued for a period of  approximately twenty minutes followed by him, forcing me to involuntarily accompany him to a local restaurant, where he again refused to remove the handcuffs unless I went with him inside, which after more failed negotiations, I did. When we returned home he finally removed the handcuffs with his key. This incident lasted an hour or so.

In light of these factors he is liable for Battery, Assault and False Imprisonment.

 

As I discussed all of the causes of actions Your Honor do you have any questions for me?

 

 

The judge then turned to Matt, and asked him to "Go ahead" or "do you have anything to say," or something like that. He did not have a speech prepared, and sort of rambled. He did not speak as long as I did. (I think I spoke about 20 minutes. I had rehearsed it at about 11 minutes, rushing, but when the judge told me to slow down, I slowed WAY down.)  Matt spoke maybe 5-7 minutes.

*He openly admitted to the relationship, but he called it an "extra-marital affair."

* He openly admitted he lied to me about his name/identity, and that he had never told me his real name.

*He openly admitted that we had talked about marriage and children, but very loudly clarified that we did not have a date set for our wedding, and that he had only ever said "someday."  (???)

 

He used the email I sent his wife to claim our relationship ended in October, 2009. This is not true. Our relationship ended the day of discovery when he sent me a text message saying he "didn't want a wife or a girlfriend right now." At the time he didn't know I knew he had both. I had put in an order for 30 yards of white silk from Joann's from my wedding dress and had been talking to my friend about her mom helping us make a pattern so we could design my dress from scratch. I had gotten quotes from two photographer's, Ravenberg, and the Sloan's. I had also contacted a videographer.

Suuuure, we weren't together at all.

 

I was really upset when I wrote about this last time because I was afraid that by me not providing the evidence that we were together through August 2010 I harmed my chances of being about to win for Fraud. I went out to dinner with my attorney a few days after the hearing (yay me! I went out!)  and I realized that I was okay with losing based on legal merit. If I lost because I had no legal standing for my case, that was okay. But if I lost because I was unprepared for court, I could not handle it. That's why I freaked out.

Anyway, through our talking we both remembered/realized the statute of limitations on fraud is three years, not two. So even if Matt successfully convinced the judge our relationship ended almost a whole year earlier, it didn't matter. I stilled filed within the three year deadline, AND fraud is calculated based on the date of discovery anyway.

 

Matt also argued this was a he said-she said. I thought this was stupid. I had paper evidence and through all my anxiety and upset I still almost rolled my eyes when he said this.

 

Matt flat our denied the handcuffing incident. I was shocked. I am still shocked. He also claimed the CHP backed him up that this never happened. (Not  true, CHP said they couldn't discipline him for it because it happened off-duty. They also called him "boorish" in relation to that incident.) He flat our perjured himself. THAT HAPPENED. He handcuffed me. I am not dreaming that up. Under oath, he lied. He flat out lied. But it wasn't until that moment I realized I had no proof it happened. But I swear on a stack of Bibles, that man tackled me, handcuffed me and took me to PIZZA HUT. My wrist was locked with a key and I could not get it off. He did not take it off until we got home. We never mentioned it again and I pretended it didn't happen.

In reference to this, Matt said I was being creative or exaggerating--- neither of those words are right, but he used a pretty phrase that basically called me a liar. Which I didn't realize until I left court, which made me a little angry. Who are you calling a liar?!

 

This post is long enough. Next time!